One of our writing prompts last week at writing group was to
write the fictional story behind a real life advert spotted in the local
supermarket. My story made everyone giggle and I hope it makes you smile too…
Nearly
new car tyre - £35
The car was a write off, all that was left intact was the
pink furry dice and one nearly new front tyre.
Well I’m keeping the dice – obviously – they were a gift
from my Nan when I passed my test. She was so proud of me for passing on the
fourteenth attempt, said it showed really determination.
She’s finally given up her own dreams of driving after
failing at the unlucky thirteenth time. If
God had wanted me to go faster he’s have given me wheels instead of legs
she always said. She was seventy-two at the time and with her failing eyesight
and dodgy hip it was probably for the
best Dad said, although he said it a bit sharper than that!
My car itself was never exactly what you would call a luxury
model but it was mine. A black Corsa with a distinctive green drivers’ door. I
suppose you could say that I am a little accident prone really as the original
matching door was knocked off in a car park.
I had to open the door to see out of my blind spot so it’s
not that I’m a careless driver who doesn’t look or anything stupid like that.
The car was full of balloons for my Nan’s surprise
seventy-fifth birthday and I’d lost my wing mirror the week before so I had to
reverse with my head hanging out of the door to see where I was going. I
quickly moved my head back in when I saw the pillar but forgot to close the
door and it was sort of ripped off.
Attack of the multi
storey car park pillar, they should
make a film says my friend Shazz, who was with me at the time laughing her
head off and recording my reactions for Facebook.
They are lethal those
things, I reply and all over the
place!
They are kinda
necessary to hold the roof up or it wouldn’t be a multi storey – duh!
Oh she’s a bright one, I’d really never thought of that
before.
Shazz also has a brother who works at a scrap yard so it was
him that fixed up my green door. He found it dead funny and went around singing
this old rock and roll song every time he saw me.
Even more annoyingly he kept asking me out, but I have my
standards and he has dirty finger nails. Must be from his job I suppose so I
might forgive him that but he also has a missing front tooth from a fight.
Otherwise he has a heart of gold and it was him that
suggested I sell the tyre to make a bit of money and I need it because who knew
you have to pay to have a car scrapped?
Ridiculous state of affairs if you ask me.
But I thank my lucky dice that I escaped from the accident
relatively unscathed, just a chipped nail. Mandy at the nail bar fixed it for
me good as new for free, she could see I was distraught and in shock so she
added three spoons of sugar to my tea for good measure.
